Non Fitness Stuff

I seem to be going through a spiritual crisis.

Regarding trusting God. In relation to trusting God with my most "treasured possessions", which are actually not possessions at all, that is, my family. Also in questioning what is true vs. what is a lie (as in Christianity vs. Islam vs. Judiasm). And questioning the logic of God. You know, the big stuff, heavy stuff. (Leave it to me. Some people have accused me of taking life entirely too seriously. They might just be right, ya think?)

. . . . . . . . which of course leaves me exhausted and with the realization that questioning the logic of God is insane since the odds of me and my human mental capabilities understanding the logic of God are worse than say, ant vs. ocean.

. . . . . . which leads me to the issue of trusting God, having faith and believing even though/if/in spite of I don't "know" everthing.

. . . . . . which is where I started.

It is enough to drive a person crazy!

So I've got nothing to write about on fitness right now because my brain is preoccupied. Seriously preoccupied.

Ah, here is something fitness related;

Except that this spiritual crisis is causing me stress, anxiety, mild depression and occasionally sheer panic.

Which I am coping by using food and eating out of panic. I won't even admit how terrible my eating has been. I saw the term, "Anxiety binge eating" in an ad today. Yep that about sums it up.

This spiritual crisis started out as frustration over unanswered prayer for my unbelieving husband and turned into an issue with me. (my unbelief).

Which is so like God, ya know? "You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:5

Finding New Ways to Kill Myself at the Gym

Blame it on the Olympics. All those competitors pushing themselves. The stories of sacrifice. The victory waves as the music plays . . . .

Me: (skipping into the gym)

Yes cardio today. Intervals to be exact.

Here is what I did.

10 minute warmup
30 sec hard, 15 sec recovery, Repeat 20 times.
2 minutes cool down (walk)
5 minutes Steady state cardio
Stretch

The intervals are a 1:1/2 ratio of hard/easy, rather than a 1:1 or 1:2 ratio of hard/easy which a lot of interval work is. I got the idea off of some bodybuilding sites. And it kicked my butt. My face was red at the end and someone in the gym even remarked "Good run, eh?" So I must of looked tired. And Tuesday when I did the workout, I got that "hurt"chest feeling from breathing so hard! I haven't felt that way in a while. I vaguely remember that feeling from my cross country interval training days in high school! AAhh. The memories. Chest hurt. Face beet red. Good Times!

The Scale Lies

I had a good Sunday and Monday. On Sunday, I cooked lots of food. Monday, I stayed on track (even though I was home with a sick child).

The scale is no indication of progress. Remember my goal of 112.0 by this past weekend. Today the scale said 112.0 which should make me happy BUT this is not reflected in my CLOTHES. I have been over-indulging for weeks and my stomach is poofed out and my arms and legs are clearly flabbier. Why is the scale lower? Probably lost muscle (Oh no!) I was definitely LEANER at 113.0. Crazy! I am working on fixing it though. Clean eating today and a good workout.

Have a good day! What can you do in the next 10 minutes that will move you a little closer to your goals? (A Tony quote!) For me, it is "Get to Work!" (I'm at work!) So bye!

P.S. 12 weeks out to my 39th birthday . . . . . . . . sound like a challenge calling? O.K. back to work now, I promise!

Tip of the Week:
Re: Intensity during your workout. Everybody knows that you need to workout with intensity. For the Tony Diva's out there, when you print out your workouts, there is usually several pages, right? If you only HAD to do the first page would you do those exercises a little harder, with more intensity? If you could, then there is room for improvement in your intensity level. If you're not a Tony Diva, basically I am saying when working out, just take it one set at a time and focus only on that set, not your whole workout.

Happy Monday to You

I meant to post this weekend. I didn't make my goal of 112.0 this weekend but it was NO surprise to me because I have not been eating clean. Plain and simple. It doesn't work if you don't do it.

BUT on to better things. I am not giving up. It is hard when you are the ONLY one who really cares if you lose those last 10 pounds or not and that is making it hard for me. At least when I had Tony, I knew there was AT LEAST one other person who cared if I met my goal this week. And it doesn't help that none of my friends are interested in fitness (not even slightly.) It's like I'm interested in basket weaving or something.

So my goals are to make progress. So far, so good today on eating but I need to get my workout done yet today. One kid is home sick, so it has to be an at-home workout rather than gym.

Tip of the Week

The tip for today:

If you make tea using tea bags, don't squeeze the bag after brewing. After seeping, just lift the bag up, let it drip for 1 or 2 seconds (not too long) and then throw away. The tea is less bitter if you don't squeeze the tea bag or let it drip too long.

Bonus tip for the day:
When baking a cake from a mix, just go ahead and mix it right in the baking pan. You don't need to dirty an extra bowl. It still comes out fine.

Now of course I wouldn't know anything about tip No. 2. I mean it is not like I just made a cake yesterday or something:)

Friday is Donut Day at Work

Well I had to stop using Tony due to money reasons. I was happy with Tony and I would recommend him to anyone, but I did not think I could continue forever due to money reasons. So now I am on my own. I am still using his plan. For now, I am rotating exercises and following the meal plan.

I had a very good week Monday through Thursday. Today was OK, not great because I had a donut at work and three, ok, four bites of ice cream tonight after dinner! My workouts have been very good this week. I worked my arms hard today and it felt great! That donut gave me extra energy. My weight is holding steady at 113.0 I want to be 112.5 by Sunday but I may have screwed that up due to the whole donut thing. Oh, well. I am disappointed but not crushed by the whole thing. It did taste good! I want to be 112.0 by next weekend so I have to work it hard the next 8 to 10 days.

Tip of the Week:
Pesto or pizza sauce can be frozen in ice cube trays and can be thawed out (about 1 TBSP at a time) and added to vegetables, chicken, etc. during cooking. I like to add a cube of pesto to my gound turkey when making turkey burgers. Yes it adds some fat but it is the good kind (olive oil, if you buy the authentic italian kind) and it is not a lot of fat and adds a lot of flavor. Pizza sauce is actually pretty good on steamed shrimp and you don't need much.

Feeling better

I feel positive today. I did it before and I can do it again!
Today's positives:

• I worked out for 45 minutes and I pushed it hard. (Total body CRIT)
• I drank a lot of water today. I made it a point to fill up my water bottle and drink it.
• I took my suppliments.

Some negatives:

• I had to cut my workout short due to time limitations and didn't get back to it.
• My third meal I had a cookie.

I need to get my "glycogen stores" depleted in order to lose fat. It seems that is when I see progress in the fat loss department. I know when they are down, when I feel like crap! Just kidding, sort of. When I walk into the gym thinking, "Ugh. Walking up steps is a chore. How am I ever going to workout?" Then I know I am on the right track for fat loss. It's when I carb up on donuts and bound up the steps going into the gym thinking, "Alright! I can't wait to get to it! I feel grrrrrrreat!" Then I'm in trouble. Great workouts but no fat loss.

So that is my plan for the next two days, to trim those starches and "glycogen deplete" so to speak. Then let the fat loss begin!

Sunday

Just popping in. I should be honest. I am not having a good two weeks. My eating has been terrible. If anyone has any words of wisdom, I would love to hear it. I just can't seem to get motivated.